That’s it. I’ve become one of the wrinklies. Back in the day when Botox was not readily available in just about every facial salon, a friend called and asked if I wanted to try it. She had a vial and was too much for two people and they needed a third. Geez – I was an easy third. Her cousin was an ophthalmologist and was going to do the injecting.
When I think of it now, he could have hit a nerve and we would have ended up in the books of botched procedures.
It went okay except the next morning when I was feeling the bad effects of Botox, that is, the hooded eyelids. Over lunch I told my son to look at my face. He said, yes? So?
I said, “I’m raising my eyebrows as hard as I can.”
No movement.
“That’s scary, Mom,” he said.
I Googled the effects of Botox and it said it takes six to eight months for the effects to subside. Meanwhile, I had to adjust my make-up style, get a fringe to cover the odd look of my eyebrows that were permanently arched.
Many years later, I was having lunch with some amigas and I noticed that my Forever Young amiga’s eyebrows weren’t moving either. She wouldn’t admit to getting Botox shots, initially, until I related my own Botox experience. Et voila! She took pity on me and said, “You OD’d on Botox. I’ll take you to my doctor.”
This time, the doctor injected my forehead and the areas around my eyes “for the crow’s feet,” she said.
The next day at the office, my friends were looking at me in an inquiring and not necessarily admiring way. Since the muscles around my eyes were paralyzed, when I laughed my cheeks apparently bunched up, sort of like those botched cases. They were too polite to say I looked like Chucky, the horror movie doll. Geez, another six to eight months again!
The Third Act
It was around this time that I happened upon a talk Jane Fonda was giving on TED Talks about The Third Act (2012). She had done a lot of research into the longevity revolution. The idea that aging was a curve with the peak at middle age and then a downhill slope after that was completely changed. She said that the last three decades (or more) of our lives, from our 60s onwards, was our Third Act. Aging was rather more like a staircase, ascending towards wisdom, wholeness, and authenticity.
Feeling recharged from that talk I happily went along with my wrinkles and my authenticity.
Then I ran into Forever Young again, and before I could say Hola! She announced she was getting her eyelids done and she could take me to her surgeon.
“But, I’ve got this authenticity thing and all,” I said.
“What are you waiting for? The second coming?” she said.
So I went and got the blepharoplasty. And I’m happy with the results. Am I feeling the authenticity? Well, yeah, kinda.
But with the eyebags reduced, the wrinkles seemed more pronounced and the surgeon said, well, now you’ll have something new to worry about. What a bedside manner.
And yes, what about the marionette lines, and the jowls and the neck! My sister said, just have someone hold the back of your neck when you’re posing for photos. You have to laugh really because it gets quite ridiculous.
It’s common knowledge that Ms. Fonda has had all sorts of procedures done. She admits to two facelifts, having a couple of ribs removed (around the time of her exercise videos allegedly to make her waist appear smaller) and breast implants. But we forgive her that because, heck, she’s Jane Fonda.
She said Hollywood was too obsessed with perfection (and so are we in the Philippines as evidenced by the advertisements that line EDSA). She said when she traveled to Europe, she met women who “owned” their faces. Not at all hung up about jowls and wrinkles.
I must hark back to my ever-inspiring Makati Blue Zone Bridge Club 89ers’.
They own their faces and they own their authenticity.
Dan Buettner says Blue Zone residents prioritize improving their personal relationships and surround themselves with like-minded individuals who enjoy healthy activities, eating wisely, walking, perhaps even dancing.
My Makati Blue Zone 89ers tick all the boxes again. They are all Viber savvy and enjoy exchanging photographs, stories, current events, opinions and TikTok videos. They keep themselves busy and interested in all sorts of activities and treasure their community, looking outside of themselves instead of a mirror.
With role models like this, I look forward to my Third Act. – Rappler.com
Bing Caballero returns to the literary scene after a long hiatus. She may be remembered for Ishmael Bernal’s “Broken Marriage” (Urian best screenplay with Jose Carreon) and her Palanca Award for “Poetry Songs in Three Continents.” The column’s name was inspired by Dan Beuttner’s work on the world’s blue zones.