A woman has been cheered by viewers on Reddit for refusing to yield her vacation to a colleague planning a family Disneyland trip, following a heated workplace standoff.
The woman, who goes by u/doodlerart on Reddit, took to the platform on May 17, to share that she is single, in her 30s and works in a creative industry. She had booked her vacation months in advance—a right she defended, even after her colleague approached her repeatedly with pleas and emotional appeals to swap annual leave dates.
The woman told Newsweek that she eventually reported her colleague to HR for "harassing" her. Her post has amassed more than 13,000 upvotes to date, with most Reddit users backing her stance.
"School holidays are coming up and I have a co-worker panicking, as she left it too late to book vacation slots," the woman said in the post. "My company had a rule where no more than three workers can leave at the same time for vacation.
"I already filled in my vacation slot months ago as I haven't taken any in nearly a year," she added. "Company HR told my coworker that her only way to get her vacation is to get one of us who already had our vacation time approved to trade with her."
The woman went on to explain that, by being single and unmarried, her coworker with children decided she would be the easiest target, out of three other workers, to approach and try to trade vacation days with.
Her coworker said that her children, aged 6 and 4, were looking forward to Disneyland and that all arrangements were already made.
"I told her no, as I too already had my vacation booked," the woman said, adding that she chose not to share that it was a solo trip.
As the colleague grew insistent—citing her kids' potential disappointment—the situation escalated.
"I blew up at her after the fourth or fifth time, telling her that her 'kids being disappointed' is none of my business," the poster added. "I didn't exactly keep my voice down so at least half the office heard."
Afterward, another colleague, a 25-year-old man, told her she could have been "a lot gentler" and that she does not "get how hard mothers get it."
Speaking to Newsweek, the Reddit user said she has since reported the incident to HR.
"I did go to HR about the co-worker harassing me as some of the comments suggested, and they're recording it down," she said. "The other two co-workers who were also scheduled for vacation were both men and heavily tattooed … I cannot be certain that it's why she didn't ask them, but she is intimidated by them."
The standoff has struck a chord with thousands of Reddit users, many of whom see the incident as emblematic of a larger issue in workplace dynamics: the disproportionate expectations placed on women—especially those without children—to accommodate others' personal responsibilities.
Patrice Williams-Lindo, CEO of Career Nomad and a workforce futurist who has coached thousands of professionals through workplace tensions and burnout, told Newsweek the incident is about far more than vacation policy.
"This is about how women—especially single women, especially women without children—are expected to absorb the weight of others' life choices under the guise of empathy," Williams-Lindo said.
"You are not less entitled to rest because you don't have children. Period," she added. "Your solo vacation matters. Your peace matters. Your personal life doesn't need to be defended, justified, or sacrificed because someone else's priorities weren't planned for."
Williams-Lindo labeled the coworker's behavior as "emotional coercion" and a troubling reflection of how many professionals are shamed into giving up boundaries "under the banner of being a 'team player.'"
Williams-Lindo also criticized the workplace policy that left resolution to peer negotiation, calling it a systemic failure.
"HR failed here," she said. "Policies must be reinforced by processes, not peer pressure.
"Asking someone to negotiate their approved PTO is a recipe for resentment, not retention."
Addressing the male colleague's response, Williams-Lindo said: "Empathy is not reserved for parents. Everyone's mental health deserves respect. Telling someone to 'be gentler' after they were cornered repeatedly is tone policing."
She added: "This isn't about who has it harder—it's about recognizing that adults are responsible for their own time management, and guilt should never be a managerial tool."
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